A Day in the Grocery Store

Setting: A produce department. Bruce and Chris have just finished attending a funeral for their friend Randy. They are both 80 years old.

Chris: What’s that?
Bruce: Words escape me.
Chris: Well, you never were too bright.
Bruce: You’ve always had a dim view of my abilities.
Chris: My eyesight’s not what it used to be.
Bruce: And I let you drive?
Chris: We’re still alive aren’t we?
Bruce: Are we?
Chris: Are we what?
Bruce: What’s that? My hearing aid just went out.
Chris: You have gout? And you never told me?
Bruce: Goats? I don’t have any goats? I had a duck once.
Chris: Duck? Why? Is someone going to throw something at us?
Bruce: The lettuce is in the back. Let’s get the new stuff.
Chris: The old lettuce is cheaper.
Bruce: You always have to bring that up?
Chris: What’ s that?
Bruce: The prices of things. The high cost of living.
Chris: I’m on a fixed income.
Bruce: Phbbbt on your fixed income! I want to live. We don’t have that much longer to go. What are we saving our money for?
Chris: You really should eat your vegetables. I spot some nice carrots to your left.
Bruce: What’s left? Have I seen all I’m going to see?
Chris: We can always go to a different aisle.
Bruce: Food is food.
Chris: It was a nice day out.
Bruce: It’s a pretty ugly day in I’d say.
Chris: I’m glad I’m not in your shoes.
Bruce: They’d never fit you.